A ((crazy)) Birth Story

Well... I'm quite behind.  Xavier is here!  And he is 3.5 weeks old already.  I have been so busy sleeping and feeding and changing diapers, and let's be honest, just staring at him, that I haven't written. Xavier was born on November 8, 2015 at 6:21am, 20 inches long and 7 pounds 3 oz.  He was born unexpectedly in my bed at home.Yep, that's right.....I woke up on the morning of the 7th and knew I was in labor.  I felt different and my body just knew those weren't braxton hick's contractions.  So I got up, showered, and decided I needed to go get my nails done because they were too long and would scratch my newborn...

38.5 Weeks Pregnant

Hi everyone...Long time no write, I know I know.  So here's the deal... I have been BAD with food.  So BAD.  At my weekly OB checkup 2 weeks ago, I lost 4 pounds in 1 week and my doctor told me not to keep up that trend.  I took his order a bit seriously, and went kinda crazy the following week and found those 4 pounds plus 1.  But, I'm still under pre-pregnancy weight so I shouldn't fret I guess?I'm feeling pretty miserable.  I'm tired of being pregnant, even though my belly is still quite small considering I'm almost due.  Baby Boy has dropped significantly and there is a lot of pain/pressure in my pelvis....

Emotional Eating

I've been eating my feelings today.  That's something I haven't done in a LONG LONG time.It just shows me that I am still a fat girl in my head sometimes and I have to try harder to fight it.  That's why I'm here now, blogging.  To keep me from putting another piece of food in my mouth.  I don't even know where it all fit.  Before noon I had eatenA piece of french toastChobani flips yogurtMeat and Cheese LunchableA small piece of Broccoli Chicken Cheddar quicheWhere the...

33/34 weeks update

The last week or so has been a complete whirlwind!Last Friday my mom came to town for our baby shower weekend and then Saturday Mr. Banker's parents arrived.  It was so amazing for them to finally meet, and it all went really well.  Of course it sucks that my father wasn't there, but I guess this is just a fact of life that I will have to come to terms with.We went to dinner with his parents, my mom, and my grandmother Saturday night and that was very nice.  We took them to Ruth's Chris and it occurred to me that I really just don't care about food that much anymore.  I didn't care what I ate or where (except that I did not...

House updates with Photos

Hi!Although not weight loss related, a few of you asked to see updates to my home I've been doing.In August, I began by tearing out the laminate in the kitchen and bathrooms, and tile flooring was installed. My kitchen also got a backsplash.My upstairs carpet was removed and we put back laminate hardwoods. They're so easy to clean and look beautiful!  You can see them pictured in the crib photo below.We painted our bedroom grey with a darker grey accent wall. I changed the bedding and we hung Mr Bankers picture of NY above our bed. It definitely feels more like "our" room now, and not just mine.For the nursery, we painted the room grey...

32 Weeks Pregnant

Hi everyone, just wanted to stop in with a quick pregnancy/weight update.So... I'm still lighter than I was the day I found out I was pregnant, but I have watched the scale creep up slightly and that is hard!  SO HARD!Above is a picture I took Friday at 32 weeks.  It's insane, I hardly even look pregnant at all.  7.5 weeks left, hopefully I can stay under my pre-pregnancy weight in the next 7.5 week...

A Love Without End

"Let me tell you a secret about a father's love...A secret that my daddy said was just between us.Daddies don't just love their children every now and then, it's a love without end, Amen."Believe it or not, I loved country music as a child.  That doesn't fit me now, but it would've if you knew a 7 year old Hollee.  The above lyrics come from a George Strait song that I loved as a kid.  Even as a child, that song could bring me to tears, and now I believe that somewhere inside I always...

Random Update- Life, Pregnancy (Week 27), Weight

Man oh Man!  Almost a month since my last post!  I remember when I couldn't make it a week without posting.  Life has gotten busier and I am guessing it will only continue to do so once Baby Xavier is here.Mr. Banker and I have been beyond busy.  We are getting the house ready for a new baby and that is a lot of work!  We're also just updating some things in my house that I should've done before and never did.  We put laminate hardwoods upstairs because I couldn't stand the idea of my baby crawling around on carpet (since I have dogs...yuck!) and did tile in the kitchen and bathrooms.  We painted our bedroom...

Revision Recap

So it's been 10 months now and for some reason, at this time, I feel very compelled to re-tell my revision story.  Why did I do it?  What is it like?  Am I satisfied?  Maybe all this is coming up because the revision rate among the bloggers I began with is INCREDIBLY high.  I have also been asked 5-6 times recently in a facebook support group about my experience, so here I am documenting it all again in one post.I had lap band surgery on 17September2012.  I had read...

Just an Update

Hi Everyone!It's been a while since I've written, because quite honestly I haven't known what to write about.I'm doing great and Baby Xavier is doing well too.  I'm finally over the horrible morning sickness phase so I haven't been gaining or losing weight really.  I'm glad to be done with the sickness- it reminded me A LOT of how it felt to be banded... not a reminder I ever want again.I'm 5.5 months pregnant now... just 3.5 more months to go!  I'm really not showing at all.  There's a part of me that wants to know what it's like to have a baby bump, and another part that is horrified at the idea of having to lose that bump...

Hospital Weight Gain :(

Somehow, I GAINED weight while in the hospital-- 4 pounds to be exact.  I don't know if the hospital food is just that good (ugh... I'm going to guess that isn't it) or that fattening... or if baby is just growing.Last week my lower abdomen and back started hurting, but I assumed it was just pregnancy related pain and went on about my business.  Mr. Banker and I had a busy weekend, so when we got home Sunday we laid on the couch together and took a nap.  I woke from my nap with sharp...

Baby Gender Reveal

If you want to know the gender.... Go here:Find out the Gender of Baby F HERE!!!And a few photos from the day: Hopefully Mr. Banker won't mind that I put his photo up here.He's so happy with the outcome that I don't think he could possibly be upset ha! Yesterday was such a wonderful day filled with friends and family!  There was so much excitement that I couldn't sleep at all last night.  Today will be a long da...

Kids say the Darnedest things...

It has been a long time since a child commented on my weight.  I had almost forgotten the feeling.  How hurtful it is, even when they don't intend for it to be.Mr. Banker and I went to the beach for memorial day with his best friend's family, including his wonderful godsons.  On the way to the beach, the oldest godson --he is 7-- rode in the car with us, and made a comment about how I was bigger than Mr. Banker.  I was at a loss for words and was glad that I was wearing sunglasses...

Do I look pregnant?

Am I in denial that I look pregnant? I didn't think so but yesterday I wrote here that I don't and a blogger informed me that I do? I don't mind if I do considering I am pregnant, I just really don't see it? ((Left in the black bathinsuit was the night before my initial surgery at 344.4 pounds))The photos in grey were taken this morning. ...

Pregnancy + Weight Update

Sooooooooooo... THIS happened this morning?!WHATTTT?I don't know where that came from, but it is nice to see while it lasts.  I know that at some point during this pregnancy, the scale is going to start increasing and it won't stop until sometime in November.  I will just have to get used to that.Friday, Mr. Banker and I have an anatomy scan to determine the baby's gender.We will have the sonographer put it in an envelope and then take it to a baker to bake us a gender reveal cake.  Then we have to wait a whole week (+2 days) for our gender reveal party!!! UGH!  But I'm so glad we're doing it, because Mr. Banker initially...

A mother's love.... a father's.....?

I believe it's true that a mother's love is unconditional. I love my mom, she's one of my best friends. I know that she will always be.My father on the other hand was horrific. I don't even want to talk about it. Instead of focusing on my father, I'd rather praise my child's father. He knew it was going to be tough so he made sure I'd come home to happiness. While I was at my parents house, he came to cut my grass and left me roses. Mr. Banker had never bought me flowers before, so he had me grinning...

Breaking the News

Sunday, after all of the mother's day festivities, I'm going to tell my parents that I'm pregnant.  I'm nervous and scared, but in a way, I'm just so ready to tell EVERYONE.  Then I can blast it from the rooftops if I want to.I've played it over and over in my head.  How I will tell them.  I've thought of long explanations and short ones, and I just don't think I can make it through the longer version.  I feel like all I can get out is "I'm having a baby and I'm due in...

Another Year Older...

Another Year Healthier!!It was a wonderful birthday, just wanted to share a few photos from my trip!Feeling kinda ballsy to put a photo in a bikini up!We went sailing on a katamaran on my birthday.It was TERRIFYING and EXHILARATIN...

Ready for Vacation!!

I'm taking an all inclusive trip to Riviera Maya, Mexico for my 27th birthday.If you've been reading my blog for a while, you may remember that I usually throw a pretty big party for my birthdays.  Here are a couple of photos from the last few:24-Pre WLS 25 26But then last year's (26th) birthday wasn't a ton of fun for me.  My friends had a blast but I ended up taking care of everyone who was drunk.  So I decided this year to do something different.3 girlfriends and I are going on an all-inclusive trip to a resort in Riviera Maya, right outside of Cancun.2 days!  I can't wai...

If you've considered joining a DietBet

Here's some motivation for you:I began on October 21, 2014 weighing 246.0 and completed the challenge on April 21, 2015 weighing 211.8.  I contributed $125 (plus $20 for weekly weigh in tokens-this is optional) and I won $292.07 AND a FitBit Flex (from the weekly weigh ins).  I'd say I did pretty well for myself on this DietBet and I definitely plan to do it again in the future.Note:  I did forget to do my official weigh in for Round 2 so I lost about $30 there.There's nothing like winning money for doing something I already planned to do anyway (LOSE WEIGHT!...

I'm expecting

This will be posted for 24 hours.  Then it will be taken down for a while, until I have grown the lady balls to tell the appropriate people... like my dad.You all may wonder why lately it's been so important that Mr. Banker meet my parents and why the sudden trip to Rhode Island to meet his parents.  Well... we're expecting a baby in November.  I've kept it a secret now for 12 weeks and I just can't any longer.That's why I'm worried about weight gain.  That's why I recently...

Meeting his Parents

I think Mr. Banker was cloned.His father is just a 30 years older version of Mr. Banker.  Same sense of humor.  Same smile.  Same laugh.  I'm usually shy around new people, but it was so easy to be around him and to love him because I felt like I already knew him from knowing and loving Mr. Banker himself.  The minute Mr. Banker left me alone with his parents, his dad asked me when I was going to marry his son and give him some grandbabies.Mr. Banker had scared me a little...